God and I.

There’s so many thoughts in my head that I feel like I should write about so I’m slightly..(more like overwhelmingly) confused as to what I should exactly write about or if it’s just one topic that I should write about or all/some of them. Now this is tricky.

You know, most people wouldn’t be able to assimilate this but I think we have this enormous, glowing, throbbing, divine power in us that can go that extra mile for us if we just let it. I think one of the most hurtful things possible under the skies would be the feeling of being let down after you’ve put your 100% into someone else. That would be a mistake right there. You cannot put your 100% into someone because the only thing you can put your 100% into is yourself and/or God and not some other soul apart from yourself. This other person was not ever responsible for your survival and will never be responsible for your survival (well not unless he/she turns out be your organ donor in which case you need his kidney/lung etc for your survival..but you get the gist of what I’m saying right?). If you put 100% of your faith in something or someone else whom you have no divine control over you’re letting go of yourself just a little bit too much. At the end of the day, when this thing that you’ve invested 100% of yourself FAILS you, it breaks you down and you hit rock bottom. This means, you are unable to function and you cannot imagine going through life anymore and I’m telling you, that’s not a place that anyone would ever want to go down to.

A very smart person once told me that you can invest upto 99% of yourself in something or someone but that you must leave that very significant 1% for yourself and God because when that 99% fails you, you still have that 1% to hold on to. That 1% is your conversations with God. That’s the once source that continues to give you faith and never fails you. Even if you fail him, he still listens to you and gives you strength to keep moving forward. The moment you stop your conversations with yourself and God, you are vulnerable to hitting rock bottom and beating yourself up thinking that you have no more purpose in life. Your ultimate purpose in life is to prosper and die happy. As long as you don’t know whether YOUR tommorow exists, you have to live as though this, here, right now, is the last moment you’ll ever have and guess what? When you die, the thing or the person you invested so much faith in doesn’t go with you. You go alone. At that point there is just you and God and NOT you and your mom or dad etc. When you’re dying, you can’t go in any other condition than in solitude. You can’t go with your mom or your pet cat or your grand pa and you can’t go with that person or thing you’ve invested yourself in! But amazingly enough, you know one thing is for sure and that is that, at whatever cost, whatever condition you maybe in, God is still watching you and He’s the one that exists when everything else ceases to exists. In the end, its just you and God.

My conversations with Allah, is sacred, divine and eternal and those conversation are the only reliable thing that I can put my trust in. There is nothing and no one else that you can invest all your expectations on except yourself and God. If you trust yourself that much and if you have that much faith in God, you are invincible and nothing can break you down. And at the end, you die content. Happy also.

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